A Con and A Fraud

A Con and A Fraud

So, I met this guy on a dating app. We went out and he seemed like everything I could possibly hope for. I liked that he seemed goal-oriented, focused, and motivated. From our first date, he seemed like someone who knew what he wanted and was as tired of the dating scene as me.

We met in October and by Thanksgiving, I met his family. I was for sure that he was serious about me, but I started to notice and find strange things. I had trust issues from previous relationships, so I would periodically search his phone or around the house.

Businesswoman hiding behind plant with binoculars

I saw that he was having inappropriate text conversations with other women and that there was also someone from his past who wouldn’t seem to leave him alone. I asked him several times to stop talking to her. He would say he stopped, but then I would always find out he was still talking to her.

Couple looking at home pregnancy test

I got pregnant three months in and I was scared because I knew it was way too soon and I was afraid that he wouldn’t want to deal with me anymore. I told him we could do this thing together or we could co-parent, but he swore I was the one for him…his true colors showed shortly thereafter.


He wanted me to get an abortion [The F*CK?] and I refused. I didn’t talk to him for a week until he showed up unannounced to apologize and with gifts. I assumed at that moment, he was completely onboard.

Vintage inscription made by old typewriter

I moved in with him when I was 8 months pregnant, but things got worse and my pregnancy was tumultuous.  We argued a lot and he didn’t really seem to be supportive.  I started to find out that he was lying about a LOT of things from his job to having a degree to being in a fraternity.

Lies concept.

Lie #1
I stopped by the well-known computer company where he told me he worked on my way home from the doctor to surprise him with the ultrasound pictures and the staff told me he didn’t work there.  Upon further investigation [by way of him leaving his boss’s business card on the TV stand], I learned that he was a cellphone salesman at a kiosk in a store.

Lie #2 & #3

A teacher writing the Greek alphabet on a blackboard.

I’m a member of one of the “finer” sororities, so overtime I thought it was strange that I never heard of or met any of his line brothers although he met some of my sorors and attended my chapter functions. I also found his lack of photos and Greek paraphernalia to be rather odd, so I contacted the undergrad chapter where he claimed he pledged and they confirmed that there wasn’t a line during the year that he crossed.

Image result for dis tew much gif

When I confronted him about it, he finally admitted he wasn’t really in a fraternity although he claimed to have gone through a pledge process and that his line was dropped. [Dropped line = not Greek!]  At that point, I figured he was lying about having a college degree, so I asked him that too. And as you can guess, he confirmed that he never graduated and didn’t have a degree.

Our son was born the following month and it continued to be a struggle. I started resenting him for all of the lying and the deceit, so the intimacy stopped. He didn’t help me much with our son and continued to go out until 2 or 3 in the morning. On the nights that he actually came home from work, he would just go to the basement and not do anything with our son. We started arguing about sex because we weren’t doing anything, but #1 my body was still trying to heal from giving birth, and #2 I resented him because of the lying and lack of help.  I couldn’t respect or lay down with a man who lied to me all of the time and saw nothing wrong with it.

The Final Straw
One night I was talking to his sister about transitioning from the military.  I told her I was adjusting financially and that it really helped that her brother and I were splitting the mortgage at his house. When I told her that, she was SHOCKED! As it turned out, he did NOT own the house as he initially told me and I was giving him money toward a mortgage that didn’t even exist. [I have no idea what he was doing with the money.]

Image result for faint gif

According to his sister, the house was already paid for and it belonged to his grandmother who allowed him to stay there.  When I confronted him about that, he tried to lie and say his grandmother charged him to live there. However, I confirmed with his grandmother and, as expected, he was lying.

This date relationship is OVER!


As of Now
I have since moved out [four months after our son was born] and it has been a struggle to mend the broken pieces while trying to be a single mother because I don’t have any family nearby. The most challenging thing for me is moving past the anger and hurt I feel and also the fact that I never got an apology from him nor has he shown any true remorse. It’s almost as if he doesn’t even feel bad about it.

I haven’t seen my ex in four months and we haven’t spoken in about a month, so we’re not co-parenting well. He sees our son when he stops by his grandmother’s house because she takes care of our son while I’m at work. Other than that, he makes no real effort to spend time with our son. Since I am not from the area and have no family here, it’s really rough because my son is literally with me all of the time. I love him, but sometimes I need a break just to recharge. I am grateful, however, for my ex’s grandma who watches my son while I’m at work as well as his sister who will watch my son if I ask. Still, nothing beats your own family, and, hopefully, I can move closer to them soon.

Ladies, if someone seems to be too good to be true, it’s because he is!


The fool who fell for the Okie Doke  

What would you do in this situation?  Was she too naive? How can they repair or rekindle their relationship? How can they positively co-parent?

Comment below! Submit your relationship drama & bad date stories to info@thisdateisover.com.

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Asian Persuasion

Asian Persuasion

So I had been dating this bi-racial guy (half black, half Chinese) off and on for a few months.  He was fine as hell; however, I was a little apprehensive about dating him initially for stereotypical reasons [I was afraid he would be too little in the middle], but I gave him a chance. We didn’t see each other consistently because we both had strenuous work schedules, travel, etc.

He gave me a call when he returned from business travel and we went out for drinks at a restaurant on my side of town to catch up. We decided to take the party back to my place where we immediately fell asleep before any adult activities could begin because we were both exhausted.

Sexy nude African-American couple embracing.

The next morning greeted us and the touchy feely stuff began followed by some sensual kisses. We had never taken it there before due to my unspoken apprehension and the fact that opportunity didn’t present itself since we didn’t see each other often. As the kissing continued and he was about to do the big reveal, he cautioned me by stating that his penis came from the black side of his family and that it was kind of big. [Oh sh*t! That’s what I like to hear!]

He pulled that thing out and IT. WAS. EVERYTHING!  

And by everything, I mean it was everything that I thought it would be……………



That thing was so disappointing and subpar…no length…no girth.  I could not believe he gassed me up like that for some short penis. He definitely didn’t get that from his black side. NOPE! [Forgive the stereotype, but ummmmmm look at the stats! I don’t know how accurate the list is, but East Asian is dead last lol] So I brought all activity to a halt and closed the shop immediately [Shallow AF!]. I told him that the timing was off and that I wasn’t ready, which I wasn’t in all actuality. From that point on, it was pretty much a done deal.



Sorry Not Sorry


What would you do in this situation?  Would you have continued on with the morning sex? Was she too shallow?

Comment below! Submit your relationship drama & bad date stories to info@thisdateisover.com.

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Kiss Kiss

Kiss Kiss

So, I was driving home one day after work and traffic was heavier than usual due to construction. While stopped, I noticed that one of the construction workers was fine as all hell. A gorgeous piece of Mexican man candy! He made eyes at me, I made eyes at him, and then BAM, I [yes me, shy me!] asked the guy for his number AND he gave it to me. [Wow!!!!!!!] I just couldn’t believe it. [Did this fine ass dude really give me his number? Am I dreaming?]

Well, we talked briefly a couple of times and decided to go on a movie date. We went to the movie theatre and no less than 15 minutes in, this dude tried to kiss me. [Whoa now. Calm down Papi Chulo!] I turned my head and slightly moved away from him so that he could see that I wasn’t ready for all of that. [Yes, I was attracted to him. We just weren’t there yet to be swapping saliva.] I thought he would’ve taken the hint and stopped trying, but NOPE! This guy, a grown ass man, started whining. WHINING!

Him: Come on mami! Mami, dame un besito. Dame un besito sexy mami!
Me: Shhhhh! Will you please stop it? I’m not kissing you.
Him: Mami, please?
Me: No. I’m trying to watch the movie. Please stop.

This guy was exhausting. He went from begging for a kiss to attempting to rub on me and I was through with his antics. I clinched my teeth together like a mother preparing to scold her children, put my lips close to his ear and said “STOP!” I should’ve gotten up and left, but for some odd reason, I decided to finish the movie. [It must’ve been a good movie or something. Who knows?]  Fortunately, he calmed the hell down as time went on.

[Update: this was before Netflix, Firesticks, Hulu, and other movie streaming services existed]

Because I was so annoyed, the plan was for me to get up and leave as soon as the movie ended and let him watch my fine a$$ sashay out of his view.  So, I plotted my escape.

The movie ended and I was on the good foot. I made a fast break away from dude and thought I was in the clear, but NOPE! As my luck would have it, there was some construction going on at the movie theatre and I tripped real REAL hard because I didn’t see the caution sign nor did I notice that some of the floor had been removed.  [Ay dios mio!]

So I had to deal with Pepe Le Pew and his incessant begging for a kiss during the movie to embarrassing the hell out of myself by slipping and damn near falling due to a botched escape only to go home with a sprained ankle. The one good thing that my date did was catch so that I didn’t fall.

This date is OVER!



What would you do in this situation?  Would you have stayed for the entire movie?  Would you continue to date the guy?

Comment below! Submit your relationship drama & bad date stories to info@thisdateisover.com.

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The Graduation

The Graduation

So I was very cool with my boyfriend’s family and had known them for close to two years. They lived out of state, about 300 miles, so I would only see them when I joined my boyfriend (when my schedule permitted) on a road trip, which was about 3-4 times a year.

Anyway, my boyfriend wanted me to accompany him to visit his family for a special occasion: his little brother was graduating high school. [YAY!]  I thought that was all fine and dandy and was excited to attend the ceremony because his brother was such a great kid with a bright future.  The only problem was that my boyfriend planned on driving up on a Monday when the graduation was actually on Friday.  [TF you going up so early for?]

I told my boyfriend that timeframe wasn’t going to work for me because I’d have to miss too many days of work, but I’d be happy to meet him up there on Thursday night [I was gonna catch the bus] and he looked at me like I had two heads or was speaking German.

This led to an unexpected argument/shouting match [well he was doing the shouting] and him going off the deep end in my opinion.

Him: That’s messed up that you’re not trying to be there to support me and my family. I’m always at your family events!
Me: Ummmm yeah, my family is closer [10 miles away] and that’s the only reason why you see them more. If your family was closer, we’d see them a lot more too.  That’s not even a fair comparison though.
Him: But that’s my brother!
Exactly! That’s your brother. Not mine. You know I love your family, but I’m not using 5 days of leave for a graduation. Sorry.  I will catch the bus and meet you out there on Thursday night so that we can go to the graduation on Friday morning.
Him: You’re not being supportive!
Me: How am I not being supportive when I’m still planning on attending the graduation and will be with y’all for the entire weekend? I’m just not riding up there with you on Monday.

He stormed off and continued his rant calling me selfish and unsupportive.


So now he’s mad and not speaking to me and I guess I’m not going to the graduation at all it seems.

What sense does it make for me to burn a hole in my leave for a damn high school graduation for someone that isn’t even my brother? Hell, I’m not taking that many days off for my own brother. Mexico, yes. Family, HELL NO! If he wants me to use that many days off, that better include him and me on an exotic beach away from both of our families.


Am I Trippin?


What would you do in this situation? Did he overreact? Was she being unreasonable? What would be a good resolution? Would you use 5 days of PTO for a high school graduation? How can they work this out?

Comment below! Submit your relationship drama & bad date stories to info@thisdateisover.com.

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Too Honest

Too Honest

So I matched with a guy on a dating app and we had a few back and forth messages. He said he wanted to take me out and I give him my number.

He texted me shortly thereafter with the standard “how’s the weather”, “how are you” off and on.  Although he never picked up the phone to talk to me, he attempted to see when I was free via text without officially asking me out.  He texted me a few days later to see if I wanted to meet later that night, but I told him that I had plans and suggested the following night.  He asked me if I was going on a date and I was astonished by the question.   I asked if he wanted the truth or a lie and he said the truth.  So, I told him yes, I had a date. He commenced to tell me that he has no time for a serial dater because that is a sick mentality.

THIS DATE IS OVER…before it even began!



At Least I Was Honest


What would you do in this situation?  Would you have answered his question? Would you consider her to be a serial dater?

Comment below! Submit your relationship drama & bad date stories to info@thisdateisover.com.

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Mr. Flaky

Mr. Flaky


So this guy I hadn’t spoken to since the beginning of the year called me around Thanksgiving to catch up.  I wasn’t too enthusiastic about his call because he had been unresponsive when I tried to reach him a few times previously, but I decided to hear him out.  Apparently, he moved out of the area, 1000+ miles to be exact [I would have known that had he kept in touch], and he wanted to get together.  I declined because I wasn’t going to make time to see someone who disappeared for damn near an entire year.

As a consolation, I humored the guy by having a video chat and  expressed my disappointment with how he handled things between us. He apologized and asked for forgiveness.  He said that since he didn’t do a good job of keeping in touch in the past [he probably had a damn girlfriend. lol], that he would do so moving forward to show that he was truly interested.

He kept his word and his communication did a complete 180. He was calling, texting, you name it, on a regular basis.  Although I didn’t take him too seriously because of the distance [something I shared with him], we remained cool.

He wanted to get back in my good graces for being M.I.A. earlier in the year and shared that he’d be in town a few days after Christmas.  He asked that I clear my schedule for Wednesday evening so that he could make it up to me.  He asked that I look into some things to do that were subway accessible since he wouldn’t be driving while in the area, so I sent over some suggestions: comedy show, bowling, concert, etc.  He selected the comedy show.


One month later as scheduled, he arrived to town right after Christmas.  We spoke on the phone to discuss the logistics of our upcoming outing set for the following day and I let him know that the doors opened at 6:30p and showtime was at 7:30p.

On the day of our date, I called him when I got off of work at around 3pm, but he didn’t answer. I sent a text, but still no response.  [Uh oh! Not a good sign.] I decided not to get ready since he wasn’t responsive [If I can’t reach a person before we are supposed to meet, oftentimes I will not get ready], so I took a nap.


He called me at around 5:15pm saying he had just gotten back from the barbershop and needed to shower.[Uh oh! Getting right for our date! I see you playa!]  He asked if I thought we had enough time to catch the show and I said “yes” because the show didn’t start until 7:30pm and he was only a couple of metro stops away from the comedy club.

I rushed to get myself together since I had been napping when I received another call from the guy at around 6pm.

Him: Man, I don’t really feel like going out because I’ve been riding on the subway all day.

john legend wife

This Date Is OVER!

I didn’t have the energy nor feel the need to argue with the guy for being so insensitive and simply said “ok”.  He proceeded to invite me over to where he was staying to “chill” [Chill? Man if you don’t get the hell on!], but I declined and ended the conversation.  He texted me few minutes later saying “you mad?”, but I didn’t bother to respond which prompted him to call me.

Him: Did you get my text?
Me: Yes. What’s up?
Him: Why didn’t you respond then?
Me: Because it wasn’t worth responding to.
Him:  Alright, well FUCK IT.
[Ends call]

Surprised young african woman with hands over her mouth

[Well damn! lol]

He texted me again:

I don’t see why you couldn’t come over here. It ain’t like I’m trying to f*ck or something. I genuinely wanted to see you. I just didn’t feel like having a car up here.

please stop

Again, I didn’t bother replying to his message because it was pointless in my opinion.  I extended myself far enough by setting aside time in my schedule and found a location that was subway accessible both per his request.  So having any further dialogue with this primadonna was beneath me, although I should’ve just ignored his invitation to reconnect in the first place.  I was trying to see the good in him, but it didn’t work out.  Lesson learned!


He Should’ve Stayed M.I.A.

What would you do in this situation?  Should she have bothered taking his initial call in November? Would you give him a second chance?

Comment below! Submit your relationship drama & bad date stories to info@thisdateisover.com.

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