The Assault

So it was fashion show weekend and it was a sort of a big deal at my school for the black population since it was one of the few events hosted for and by black students at my predominately white institution. We were expecting to have visiting sorors [translation: sorority sisters] and bruhs [translation: fraternity brothers], so the plan was to go to the fashion show, followed by the after party, and then to set out [translation: social gathering with food, folks, and alcohol] at my line sister’s apartment. She had a 3-bedroom apartment to herself, so she had the space to accommodate everyone.

Fast forward to set out

We were 30+ deep at line sister’s house. Lights were dim, drinks were flowing, food was yummy, some folks were partaking in 4/20 activities….we were chanting, singing, dancing, etc. It was a good time for all and the rooms were filled with people [Oh to be in college again!].

Well I had my eye on Drew, one of the visiting bruhs, so I made certain to make conversation with him as often as possible [hey, I was shy…didn’t know how to approach guys and, actually, I still don’t. lol].

Anyway, I was in the middle of a conversation when I got a tap on my shoulder from Greg, another visiting bruh, asking to speak with me and he told me he’d be in one of the guest rooms. I didn’t think anything of his request because everyone was all over the apartment in the different rooms since we all couldn’t comfortably fit in the living room or kitchen at the same time. My assumption was that he either wanted to smoke some weed because folks were smoking in one of the rooms or that he wanted me to hook him up with one of my line sisters or a visiting soror.

So I walked into the room and it was pitch black. [What the f***? Where is everybody?] I couldn’t see sh*t. I said “Hello?” and walked toward the light switch assuming I was in the wrong room, but before I could even get to the light switch, the door closed and I was tackled to the ground. I was held down with so much force that I felt like I had been hit by a truck. I freaked out and started screaming “get off of me!!! get off of me!!!”, but this guy wouldn’t stop. He started kissing all over me while holding me down as I kicked and screamed. He went from my face to my neck. Then he put his face next to my ear telling me how much he liked me and that’s when I realized it was Greg who was on top of me.

Me: What are you doing?!!!!??? Get off of me!!!

Him: I just really like you.

Me: Huh? What is your problem? [I mean this is not the way to go about telling a woman that you like her]

Him: Oh I get it. You like Drew don’t you. TELL ME YOU LIKE DREW!

Me: I don’t know what you’re talking about. Please get off of me!

I continued to kick and scream, but he was just too strong and since no one could hear me screaming over the loud music and conversations, I feared the worst was going to happen. He continued kissing on me as I squirmed and that’s when my heart sank. I thought “Oh my God, this guy is going to rape me.” As I prepared to accept the inevitable something miraculous happened: he let me go…..but not before giving me a parting gift and that gift was him biting me on my breast. [A$$HOLE!]

This Date Is OVER What the F*CK!?

Once he finally removed me from his football/kung fu grip, I got the hell out of that room and stayed away from him for the rest of the night. No, I didn’t call the police and I didn’t tell any of the bruhs nor my sorors who were present. Why? Because 1) I was shocked, 2) I didn’t want to stir up any drama, and 3) I felt stupid for going into the room. I had no clue that the room was even empty and I definitely didn’t know that this guy had any interest in me whatsoever. I just wanted to move on as if it never happened and that’s exactly what I did. I didn’t mention it to anyone.

Now, I’m not saying that my method of handling the situation was best, but that’s how I chose to deal with it. Seeing how so many women who are victims of rape or sexual assault are put through the wringer, I couldn’t help but wonder how much of a headache it would’ve been to proceed with some sort of legal process coupled with the possibility of being ostracized (by the Greek community) for speaking out against Greg. *shrugs*

Fortunately, I didn’t/don’t have any anxiety attacks…I’ve never cried about the situation. I just. don’t. feel. I don’t know how I’m supposed to feel.

Surprisingly, I’ve run into Greg a few times over the years after this incident at various events and still, I feel nothing. He’s never once apologized to me and, yet, I’m actually cordial to this guy on the rare occasion that we cross paths. Strange right?

Sincerely,

That’s My Story

***Note: Names have been altered for the purpose of this post….i.e. no real names were used.***