What Is That Smell?

So I was on a weekend road trip with my sorority sisters, as we had a step competition. Being the devastating, dynamic, divas that we are, of course we came in first place. [Know us! Lol]

Anyway right after the show, we were chilling in our hotel room with the local sorors and some of their guy friends. Well I really seemed to hit it off with this one guy and we started talking about everything under the sun. While we were talking, I couldn’t help but get distracted by a weird smell. It was very faint at first, but then it started to grow stronger and stronger. I began to panic because I thought my deodorant had given up on me because, after all, I had just gotten off of the stage from doing a very intense step performance. I immediately became paranoid and started to be rather disappointed in myself for having invited guests to our room before I had showered. [Major violation!]

So I made a mad dash to the bathroom and began to smell myself profusely to determine the origin of the offensive odor. When I say I took off everything, I TOOK OFF EVERYTHING – my shoes, socks, underwear, shirt – and smelled every part of my body that was humanly possible. But guess what? I DIDN’T STINK! [WHAT???? Then what the F*** is that smell?]

I came out of the bathroom a wee bit confused – happy that I didn’t stink, yet baffled that I couldn’t find the odor – and went back over to my new friend to continue our chit chat. While we were wrapping up our conversation, the smell returned and I excused myself for the second time.

As I was doing my second walk of shame to the bathroom, one of the local sorors noticed the distressed look on my face and pulled me aside.

Her: What’s wrong soror?
Me: There is this weird smell and for the life of me I cannot figure out what it is?
Her: (She starts laughing) Girl, you know you’re talking to Stinky Breath Steve right?
Me: Stinky Breath Steve?
Her: YES!
Me: Noooo! I refuse to believe that smell is actually human breath. OMG I thought it was me! I even went into the bathroom and smelled myself thinking I was the culprit.

Dude’s breath smelled like a landfill. SMH!