New Year, No Date

So every New Year’s Day, my friends and I do a girlfriends brunch to start off the new year. As per usual, I stuffed my face: crab cakes, bacon, omelettes, OH MY! We said our goodbyes and as I was leaving the restaurant, my phone rang…it was the guy I met a few weeks prior. Let’s call him Henry (not his real name).

Henry asked me what I was doing and I let him know that I was headed home from brunch. He said that he wanted to see me before I got home and asked if I wanted to grab a bite to eat. [Ummmmmm are you deaf? Did you not hear me say that I just ate a HUGE brunch?]

Since I was stuffed beyond stuffed from brunch, I suggested that we get together at a later date or perhaps in the evening because I couldn’t stand the thought of being around any additional food or alcohol [I had a bunch of mimosas too].

After asking me three more times to eat, he then suggested that we go to the movies. I didn’t want to go, but decided to take one for the team because after all, I declined his initial offer grab something to eat.

Him: Well, I want to see you. How about we check out a movie instead? Whatever you want to see.

Me: Ok. I’m headed to the gas station, so let me check my movie app to see what’s out and call you back in a few.

5 minutes later

Me: I’d like to go see XYZ Comedy Movie.

Him: Let’s go see XYZ Action Movie instead.

[UMMMMMM that’s not how any of this works!]

I was starting to get annoyed [Why did you tell me to pick the movie in the first place?], but decided not to sweat it. I asked him what movie theater and he mentioned a location that was 50 miles away from where I was coming from (I was still near the restaurant). [Haaaaaaaaaaa! You must be out of your damn mind if you think I’m going to drive 50 miles for some bullsh*t movie….NOT happening!]

I let Henry know that the movie theater was too out of the way for me and suggested a location that was closer to the both of us, but he was adamant about going to this particular theater.

Him: I really want to go to the XYZ Theater.

Me: Unfortunately, that’s a bit out of the way for me….almost an hour to be exact and I’m about 30 miles from home at the moment. Itis + long drive just isn’t going to work. Where are you leaving from?

Him: I’m leaving from home.

Me: Great. Well since you live down the street from me, can I ride with you?

Him: Nah.

Me: Nah? What’s the problem?

Him: I don’t really want a bunch of people in my car.

Me: Please stop! You cannot be serious. I’m only one person.

Him: Well, I have a spare tire on my car and I don’t want too much weight on it.

Oh SH*T! Did this guy say that I was too fat to ride in his car? Lol

THIS DATE IS OVER!

By that time I was too through with the back and forth and insulted that I was going to “add too much weight” on his spare tire, so I told him to ~~F** off~~ take care and that I wasn’t driving to that movie theater. And that was the end of that.

I hope this isn’t a preview for the remainder of the year! Lol

Sincerely,

F*** Your Car!