So I had been seeing this chick, let’s call her Brenda, for a few weeks and I was feeling her…so much so that I decided to take her on a little road trip from DC to Philly to dine at a very nice restaurant. I should’ve known something was amiss with Brenda because when the waiter asked her how she wanted her steak, she said “HOT”. [What the f*** BRENDA DAMN! Act like you’ve been somewhere.]
The waiter looked at me with the “she cannot be serious” face and all I could do was shake my head and give him the uncomfortable “yes, she is serious” look. I was so embarrassed, especially since the waiter had the look of sheer disgust on his face, but in an effort to not make Brenda feel like a total dumbass idiot, I tried to humor the waiter and told him to “make my steak hot too ha ha ha”. [INSERT BLANK STARE] He was not impressed and said, “all of our steaks are served hot” and walked away. I excused myself from the table and told Brenda I had to go to the bathroom, but I actually went to speak with the waiter to tell him to make my steak medium rare and hers well done.
I made the long drive back to Brenda’s place in DC…We arrived at around midnight that night and we were talking as we sat in the car saying our goodbyes and such. Out of nowhere, we noticed a woman of sorts walking down the street in our direction. I assumed that this woman would continue on her merry way, but when she walked by the front of my car, she stopped at about 3 or 4 feet away from Brenda’s side and bent down to see who was inside the car. [Awkward] I was thinking this chick was going to try to rob us or ask for drugs, so I told Brenda to ignore her and to NOT roll the window down. Brenda said “She might need directions or something” and I said “Nobody (on foot) needs directions at this time of night. Don’t roll down the window.”
Unfortunately, Brenda ignored my wishes and rolled down the window anyways. [What the f*** Brenda!]
So this “woman” leans in on Brenda’s side of the car and started hitting on me telling me that I was so cute, how “she” wanted to get with me, and to make matters worse, this wasn’t even a real woman. It was a mother f***in MAN! [SHOOT ME NOW!] I was PISSED and told that shim to “GET THE F*** AWAY FROM MY CAR!” and this shim had the nerve to say to me “well aren’t you precious” and walked away. At that point, I was beyond done with Brenda and told her to “remove yourself from my car.”
This Date Is OVER!
Sincerely,
Act like you’ve been some damn where and learn how to follow directions!
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